Once A Year, I Do My Own Complete Recalibration Program
I am putting myself through my Complete Recalibration program while also editing it to make it better for you. Honestly, I’ve come to the conclusion that regardless how experienced you are in nutrition, lifestyle, biohacking, spirituality, etc. this program is incredible. I consider myself pretty experienced and every single time I go deep into recalibrating and detoxing, new profound lessons, learnings, and gifts arise. Because it’s the depth to which you take it and show up for it that matters most. I had no idea I would be experiencing what I am experiencing this time around but here I am – going deeper into my own process and magic is in the making.
But getting to the magic is not always fun, easy, or a walk in the park. Sometimes it is hard, challenging, and brings you to your hands and knees in tears like it did me this round. And even though there is always a silver lining, it reveals itself over time. I didn’t know that weeks into my Recalibration, I would lose my beloved kitten, Gucci, of almost five months. That this Recalibration would be such a spiritual resetting point for me. AND I’m here for it.
I’ve been sitting with deep questions like…
- What are my values and priorities? What really matters to me most?
- Am I living in the way I truly desire?
- Is this it?
- What do I truly want?
- What makes me happy and fills my heart with joy?
- Am I having fun? What is fun for me these days?
- What’s it all for if love is not the cornerstone of my existence? All this busy-ness, what is it all for?
- Am I really that busy that I cannot take time to take daily walks around my farm, prepare dinner with my husband, and make time for intimacy?
- Am I being the person I dream to be?
- How do I really want to show up?
- Am I fully aligned with my Soul Mission? What is my Soul Mission now?
I’m on a quest to answer these questions. It’s funny because I thought I had a grasp of them but now that I’m in my 40’s – I’m reinventing myself and I’m coming back to these fundamental questions. On that note, your 40s do come with a reinvention that no one really prepares you for. It’s a very intimate with yourself and God decade where you refine, recalibrate, and re-imagine who you are at your core. I’m going to write a separate blog about this later.
What Is Coming, Is Going
Gucci brought a lot to the surface with her transition. Things I’ve been too busy to feel and now cannot stop feeling. I always tell my clients during their Complete Recalibration that “What is coming is going.” So I deeply welcome everything that is percolating and coming to the surface because this is the alchemy I’ve been waiting for – the deep shadows that have been running my subconscious mind that I haven’t been able to sit with properly or see fully are coming to surface.
Gucci’s two brothers and sister (OB short for Obsidian, Hermes, and Coco) came in hot after she passed. Literally, the next day they started running into the house, to fill our hearts with some softness. And obviously it’s not the same… but it helps. Over the years, I’ve learned that love always finds us in mysterious ways and our job is to keep our hearts open.
It’s so easy to contract during pain, heartache, and heartbreak but can you leave your heart cracked open? Can you soften a little more? Can you trust a little more and give yourself some grace?
Reincarnation Unfolding
There is a Reincarnation in the process that I anticipate to unfold over the next months in 2026. This time around I’m bringing you along for the journey to witness my reunion with Gucci. Gucci and I had a very special relationship that I’ll tell you about at a different time, she was Trystan reincarnated. My blue eyed baby. And all of this Reincarnation stuff continues to unfold as a part of my Recalibration – deepening my knowledge, wisdom, and experience around Reincarnation.
At this point it’s between me, God, and Gucci. Watch for the blog, “Me, God, & Gucci” where I’ll tell you all about Trystan’s reincarnation.
My Shopping Addiction Surfaces
I’ve also been observing my shopping addiction come to the surface and I’m feeling really uncomfortable with it. I find myself overspending and living beyond my means. Not something I’m proud of and a little ashamed to admit. Don’t worry, I’ve done a lot of work around shame so I’m not keeping my addiction a secret. But this too is apart of my spiritual Recalibration – being smart with my money.
I have a talent for shopping and finding incredible things. This Burgundy season has been doing my head in, I’ve had Burgundy Fever where I desire everything in Burgundy. I’ve always loved Burgundy but now I’m seriously obsessed. I have impeccable taste but this dopamine activation needs to be solved. Giving my power away to doom scrolling and doom shopping is not apart of my big picture vision.
I literally spend hours upon hours every week putting things in and out of my cart until I hit purchase. Needless to say, I’m lying to myself when I tell myself that “I don’t have enough time” or “I’m too busy.”
More Please!
I bought the book The Molecule of More by Daniel Lieberman and Michael Long to go deeper into understanding what is this dis-ease called “more” and “never enough”? How are my dopamine centers really activated here? For me it’s shopping for you it could be nicotine, alcohol, cocaine, sex, lying, cheating, stealing, or a million other vices. It would all do us some good to better understand these parts of ourselves. When something has power over us, we are left feeling disempowered. When we are disempowered, we are not confident and when we are not confident we are insecure about the direction of our lives.
“Not Enough Time” Is A Lie We Tell Ourselves
Everyone has their priorities and the truth is that we all have a lot of time to do the things we prioritize. So the solution may just be to change our priorities – the kind of priorities that actually make us better people and bring us closer to our dreams. Now, if I were an “influencer” getting paid to shop and being sent free things to vlog about – that would be another story. I follow a lot of influencers and at the end of the day, joke is on me because I’m the one who spends my money. And there’s a whole conversation here around consuming vs. producing that we can have but I’ll save that for another day.
I’m also cutting myself some slack and giving myself some grace because I’m reinventing myself, my image and fashion. How I show up for myself, how I feel in my own body, the clothes that I wear, the image that I envision for myself – these things are so important to me. When I wear beautiful things, I feel good. Cashmere and silk touching my skin makes me come alive. Maybe I need to build more internal self-confidence so I don’t need these things. I’m in my process – figuring it out one step at a time.
At the same time, it’s one thing to save, invest, and have money left over for shopping – it’s another to buy with credit and having to pay it over time. I want to reverse my purchasing power when it comes to clothes, makeup, and things I really don’t need but want. Otherwise, I feel stuck in a trap of never enough and in this cycle where it actually is never enough… by design. Because once you buy whatever you desire to feed the dopamine hit, minutes, hours, days, weeks later you’re already shopping for the next thing. AND THERE’S ALWAYS A NEXT THING. You get an itch for another dopamine hit like a true addict who can barely control yourself. And when everything around you feeds this addiction, it becomes even harder to break.
We are such a consumerism culture.
Everyone has a vice, this one has been mine and it has gotten out of control this year. The volume has been turned up to a whole new level I’ve never experienced before. It’s like the algorithms and AI are really targeting us to spend our money faster. I mean they are let’s be real but regardless, I avoid playing the blame game as much as possible. I’m aware and in control of myself, I believe in sovereignty, radical self-responsibility, and being a victor vs. a victim. I get to reprogram my brain and do things differently. As David Ghiyam teaches us to say, “Oh what a pleasure!” What a pleasure that I am conscious of my next big breakthrough. Oh what a pleasure that it’s becoming more clear to me. Oh what a pleasure that I get to work through my next level.
So here I am on a mission to do things differently. Don’t worry, I’ll share with you what I discover.
On A Physical Note
Overall I feel really good in my body – light and more energetic. I did the hardest thing I thought I could never do – I gave up caffeine. I wake up in the morning feeling better than I did when I was drinking it. I’m no longer dependent on coffee to wake up and get through the day – and this is a celebration! Besides, when I need them, I have my NAD+ sub-q injections!
My bladder issues have seemed to resolve. The acid, the oxalates, the way caffeine started to affect my bladder made me feel like I was having a low grade UTI (urinary tract infection) all the time. I don’t know why or how my bladder became so sensitive to caffeine but it’s one thing I was hitting pretty hard without a break. When I was in my twenties, I’d only drink coffee in the winter when it’s cold and give myself a break the rest of the year. That all changed when we opened our private practice. I would convince myself that if stopped coffee and went to three cups of matcha that I was doing something better for my body. All the EGCG’s have to be good right??? Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case for me.
It seems the older we get the more sensitive we become especially in our female reproductive organs. Ditching caffeine is a small price to pay for having a healthy bladder at this stage of my life. And perhaps in a few months, one latte a week as a ritual may be my sweet spot but I’m not ready to reintroduce it just yet.
Building Strength
2023 and 2024 were two years where I completely stopped working out. I’m so proud and happy to say that this year since May, I’ve been hitting a private gym with a personal trainer three days a week… and I love it! My goal was to increase my strength and I definitely feel stronger in my body. I feel tight and fit and it’s the best feeling in the world. I saw a few women who are forty plus on Instagram that really motivated me to get back into working out. Besides, after the age of forty, you cannot mess around anymore.
How you care for yourself in your 30s sets you up for your 40s and so on. This decade sets me up for how well I age into my fifties and beyond. “Pay now or pay later but sooner or later you have to pay” has always been motto. I choose to pay now. It’s always cheaper to pay now. If you have the awareness and consciousness of what you have to do now, do it now. For me it’s all the things I’ve been mentioning in this post – live a detox lifestyle (always come back to clean), workout to build strength and muscle, be smart with my money now, and prepare for death (not in a bad way but in the live fully, go all in and be grateful kind of way).
Powerful Aging Is A Point Of View
I’m motivated to change my story around aging. It is possible to become healthier, sexier, and wealthier with age and I’m living proof of it.
We have a choice to make as we get older – dread it or embrace it. And this one powerful choice sets us up for peace and happiness or misery and dis-ease.
I love having a personal trainer that motivates me and switches up my workouts without me having to think about it. One hour workouts three times a week is all my body needs to be strong and healthy. You don’t have to workout like a crazy maniac unless you love it. I love to work out in the mornings before starting my work day.
Clarity Equals Power
Because I’m in the process of editing and upgrading my Complete Recalibration program, I’m giving myself the grace of more than sixty days. Letting the dust settle allows for clarity. This is what I love most about detoxing – detoxing allows for the dust to settle so you can see things clearly for what they are. Recalibration is a spiritual process as much as it is physical. All the places you get hung up on, old wounds and trauma, emotions and thoughts holding you back – all the things that aren’t working have the opportunity to surface. That’s why it’s called Complete Recalibration. You’re recalibrating what truly matters – health, love, connection to self, God and others, passions worth pursuing, a career that makes you happy, and living a purpose driven life. By releasing all the things that don’t matter, you make room for the things that actually do.
And because this isn’t an overnight process, I yearn to be in this recalibration space a bit longer.
What I value most right now is knowing I am healthy and proactively preventing dis-ease. This allows me to feel empowered within my own body. Life stops when we’re worried about our health because it consumes us. There are so many things in life we cannot control. Cleansing on a cellular level – physically, spiritually, emotionally, mentally – this is our work, this we have control over.
AND this gives us a fighting chance.
Ready for your own Complete Recalibration? Find out more about it here.
